Friday, 30 January 2015

bbc news africa Boko Haram crisis: Chad 'captures Nigerian town from militants'


Chad's army has driven Boko Haram militants out of Malumfatori town in north-eastern Nigeria, a senior official from Niger has told the BBC.
The reported capture of the town, which lies near the borders of Chad and Niger, follows two days of fighting.
Both ground and air forces are reported to have been used in the assault.
Niger officials said Chadian ground forces moved into the town after crossing Lake Chad. It is not known if the operation was approved by Nigeria.
Refugee who fled from Boko Haram Hundreds of thousands have been displaced because of the Boko Haram insurgency
Boko Haram insurgents have carried out a number of cross-border attacks on Nigeria's neighbours in recent months, attacking villages and military bases.
The Islamist group has seized dozens of people and taken them back to north-east Nigeria, where it controls a swathe of territory.
Action plan The Nigerian authorities say they are doing all they can to tackle the militants but neighbours, including Niger and Cameroon, have said more must be done.
Chad has already sent troops to Cameroon to help it counter Boko Haram incursions and last week Nigeria said the Chadian army would be fighting on its territory.
However, it was not immediately clear if the authorities in Abuja had prior knowledge of, or any role in, the operation in Malumfatori.
People who fled the area told the BBC they had seen military planes bombing the town, which is on the shores of Lake Chad.
Armoured vehicle of Boko Haram captured by Nigerian troops The Nigerian army has recently captured military vehicles used by Boko Haram
Some of those who left the town during the fighting are reported to have crossed into Niger.
Meanwhile, reports from the area say fighting has now spread to a nearby town, Abadam.
Nigerian officials have made little public comment. They said they were investigating the reports of fighting in the north-east.
Aviation Minister Osita Chidoka told the BBC that Nigeria "has to redefine its fault lines in fighting" Boko Haram.
He said tackling the group required not just military action but also "improving the capacity of the Nigerian state" in areas such as the judiciary, prison system and law enforcement agencies.
"A lot will be done about Boko Haram beyond fighting them in the north-east part of the country," he said.
African Union heads of state are due to discuss the crisis over Boko Haram at their summit beginning on Friday.
Ghanaian President John Mahama has said the leaders must produce a "specific plan of action" to "deal permanently" with Boko Haram.
Thousands have died and many more have been displaced because of the group's six-year insurgency.
Soldiers of the Chadian army at the border between Nigeria and Cameroon - January 2015

i love nigeria


1. Africa is the future, Nigeria is her giant – It’s obvious to the world that global prosperity going forward will hinge heavily on Africa and Asia. I love Nigeria because we are divinely, strategically located and placed in Africa.



2. Nigeria is the most populous black nation – and a buying one at that. From a capitalist point of view, this makes for a great investment opportunities.

3. Nigeria is the land of opportunity. It is pretty much a virgin market with capacity for many business ideas. If you have a brilliant idea and the funding, you will make so much money in Nigeria. Why? There are over 160 million people and a large informal market of consumers. If you identify the right market segment and establish a business, your profit margin will go through the roof. For instance, at the advent of mobile phones in the country, a South African company, MTN, came into the country as one of the first foreign investors. It is said that the company makes more profits from Nigeria are higher than its home country.

4. An expanding commercial market. Lagos is currently the second most populous city in Africa, following Cairo. The United Nations predicts that by 2025 Lagos will be the 11th largest city in the world.

5. The UK government in 2011, described Nigeria is the world’s fourth fastest growing economy with solid growth expected in the next five years.

6. The size (population) of the country, Nigeria, makes it a potential business/salesperson’s paradise (over 160 million potential consumers — the largest market in Africa).

7. Nigeria’s market is indeed very promising. With over 160 million potential customers you simply can’t go wrong.

8. Nigeria is Africa’s largest mobile market with over 85 million subscribers.

9. Recent developments in the payments space means that online and mobile transactions will make a huge footprint in the coming years. There’s never been a better time to get Nigerian businesses taking advantage of the internet and the wide range of opportunities that come with it. This works especially well for those selling products.

10. Nigeria is the largest market in Africa for Guinness and the second largest globally, after UK, since it overtook Ireland in 2007. Nigeria owing to its market size, is predicted to take the lead ahead of the UK by 2014.

11. Nigeria, previously viewed as a risky investment environment, is gradually becoming the investors target especially with the growing middle class. The Fast Moving Consumer Goods market in 2011 has experienced much expansion with multinationals like Coca-Cola Hellenic, Heineken and PZ Cussons increased investments in their local units.

12. We make frighteningly good use of opportunity when it presents itself. Take a look at communication and the adoption of technology. I daresay that there is no country that adopted faster. If we light up Nigeria today, I assure you, we’ll leap ahead twenty years in two.

13. Another reason to like Nigeria is because of the future we can see. Because people are becoming more enlightened each day and the youth is more hands-on than ever before; I can be pretty confident that not too long from now, this should be a country to be reckoned with. I like Nigeria for the future I see.

14. Nigeria is not only about size, it’s about numbers and companies that are not selling in Nigeria are missing out on huge market.

15. I like Nigeria because it is a land of endless opportunities and possibilities. Nigeria is one country I believe the world is yet to experience it true potentials. I believe Nigerians are sharp, brilliant and accommodating people. Giving the right enabling environment the world will marvel at what Nigeria will become.

16. The taxation system is a reason to like Nigeria. The Federal government doesn’t impose heavy tax on the labour force. This encourages foreigners to come to Nigeria to work, for there is good pay as well as returns. For instance, in Germany there is dog tax, however in Nigeria, you’re free to own as many dogs as you please without having to bother about paying the government for your pets.

17. You can sell weave to a woman with perfectly good hair on her head. With over 160 million people making up Africa’s biggest consumer market, you can sell nearly any type of product or service in Nigeria and still have a huge market! People here are just hungry for excellent products – and they’ve got the buying power to back it up!

18. We confound acclaimed economic models, yet you ignore us at your own peril. In economics, sociology, psychology and politics, Nigerian case studies are worth pursuing.

19. Unlimited data (well, nearly unlimited) for the Blackberry Internet Service, is relatively cheap when compared with what my colleagues pay in the US and the UK. N3000 for a month? That sounds like a deal, and is especially useful for mobile small businesses. It really helps, considering that the price of regular broadband internet versus what one actually gets is rather expensive.

20. The fact that Nigeria currently lags behind so much – in infrastructure and developmental terms – hints at the size of the potential for innovation and transformation, and at the huge number of vacancies that exist for ‘transformers’. What I think this means is that the world will be hearing a lot about Nigeria and high-achieving Nigerians (in the public and private sectors) in the near future.

21. The agricultural potential of Nigeria will make her the envy of developed nations in years to come.

22. I left a seed of black-eyed bean in my kitchen sink, next day it was already sprouting. Where else in the world does that occur except Nigeria?

23. Our business environment is very welcoming and full of untapped business opportunities.

24. Our youth population is a force that can be used for good, and if empowered, will drive Nigeria’s small scale industries potential.

25. Shopping in traffic jams – the ultimate time saver! The hawker’s market is one that begs economic research.

26. Nigeria is one of the fastest growing countries in the music and film industry. This is good for investors.

27. There are LOADS of opportunities. It’s virgin ground for loads of innovation and new unique ideas.

28. Nigeria is a developing country and this creates an avenue for investment which will foster growth.

29. Nigeria is the future of the world. Increasing attention from foreign economies is proof positive for this.

30. There are many economic opportunities, and recent global consulting company reports point to Nigeria and Africa as the future.

31. Nigeria is the land of opportunity, where you can invest in loads of things {Economic investment}.

32. Our man power, which has made foreigners form an alliance with us to aid and promote industries and industrial investment.

33. NIGERIA is that country where you can make good money from businesses with fair tax costs.

34. Entrepreneurs can flourish in Nigeria. There is a mass market of consumers and many business opportunities.

35. Innovation and world-changing-ideas abound in infinite quantities in this great country. The only boundary is support.

I LOVE MY COUNTRY SO MUCH!!! THE ONLY THING WE NEED IS GOOD GOVERNMENT!!!!!

problem with nigeria

The Federal Republic of Nigeria remains the baby giant of Africa sitting very close to the heart of Africa about 10 degrees north of the equator just at the western coast. The Federal Republic of Nigeria is the most populous country in all of Africa and the eighth most populous country in the world today. Nigeria has a total land area of about 923,768sq.km (about 1.5% of which is covered by water) with about 853km of coastline. Just about 33.02% of this total land area remains arable (land good for farming). Nigeria ranks 32nd in the world by total land area. Nigeria shares borders with the People's Republic of Niger to the North, the Republics of Cameroon and Chad to the east and the People's Republic of Benin to the west. Nigeria also borders the Atlantic Ocean (Gulf of Guinea) to the south.
Nigeria remains the most populous country in Africa today with an "estimated" population of about 178 million people (Ethiopia the second most populous country in Africa today has a total population of about 96 million people. Followed by Egypt with about 85 million people). Nigeria's population growth rate hovers around 2.6%. Nigeria comprises of 36 different states with Abuja (Abuja has a total land area of about 713sq.km and a population of about 2 million people) being the federal capital.
More than 50% of the total population of Nigeria live in urban areas in major cities and towns such as Lagos (the most populous city in Africa today). Lagos City which used to be the capital of Nigeria from 1914 to 1991 remains the heart and soul of Nigeria with a population of about 11 million people. Kano (another major city in Nigeria today with a population of about 3.5 million people), Ibadan ( a major city with a population of about 3 million people), Kaduna (with a population of about 2 million people), etc. remain some of the major cities and towns in Nigeria today.  Nigeria comprises of about 250 different ethnic groups with Igbo, Yoruba, Hausa and Fulani being the most dominant ethnic groups both socially and politically. The Yorubas make up about 21% of the total population. The Igbos make up about 18% of the total population. The Hausa and Fulanis together make up about 29% of the total population. Other "influential" groups living in Nigeria today include the Ijaws who make up about 10% of the total population, the Kanuris (make up about 4% of the total population), the Ibibios (make up about 3.5% of the total population), and the Tivs (make up about 2.5% of the population). Islam remains the most dominant religion in Nigeria today with about 50% of the population being Muslims. Christians make up about 40% of the total population with indigenous believers forming the remaining 10%.
There are more than 550 different languages spoken in Nigeria today (Please note: according to history, Nigeria had about 1500 different ethnic languages most of which are dead due mostly to outside influence) with English being the official language and "Pigdin" (broken English) being the street language.
Nigeria has a literacy rate of about 61.3% for the total population with the female literacy rate hovering around 50.4%. In other words, just about 50.4% of the total population of females above age 15 can read and write. Although this literacy rate is far better than in countries like Burkina Faso, this literacy rates falls far below expectation compared to countries like Botswana, Zimbabwe and even Kenya. Although just about 60% of the total population above age 15 can read and write in English Language, almost the entire population do speak and understand the "pidgin" language (broken English) which helps a lot in communication especially on the streets.
Most African countries especially the English speaking countries like Ghana also do speak and understand pidgin which helps a lot in communication between these countries.
Nigeria is a very rich country in terms of human and natural resources (including natural gas, petroleum, tin, iron ore, coal, limestone, niobium, lead, zinc, arable land). Nigeria is an oil rich country (the leading exporter of oil in Africa today) and one of the leading oil exporters in the world (the 6th leading oil exporter in the world today). Please note: The petroleum industry remains the largest industry and the main generator of GDP (Gross Domestic Product) in Nigeria today.
Despite the abundance of human and natural resources, Nigeria remains one of the poor countries in the world today. Nigeria has the largest population of poor people in Africa today (Some will blame it on the population size). Nigeria unlike countries like Ghana, Botswana, etc. suffers the most from population explosion.
CORRUPTION, poor management of funds, political instability and poor governance continue to tear Nigeria apart. Nigeria although not the "most" violent in Africa, remains the most corrupt country in Africa today with very high unemployment rates. Almost all political figures in Nigeria today engage themselves in corrupt activities leaving the average guy on the streets with nothing but poverty and despair.
Although Nigeria has many graduates, most of them end up on the streets with nothing at all to do after college. Most of these unemployed graduates engage themselves in online scams and other fraudulent activities (popularly known as the 419 business) just to survive.
Between 45-60 percent of the total population of Nigeria lives below poverty line. Most people have given up on education because they find nothing useful to do with their degrees after college. These days you see children of school-going age roaming about on the streets hawking.
About 3 to 5 million people are living with HIV/AIDS in Nigeria today. About 220,000 HIV/AIDS deaths were recorded in 2009 alone.  Most children on the streets have lost either one or both parents to HIV/AIDS. Ethnic and religious conflicts especially between Muslims and Christians worsen the situation in certain parts of Nigeria today. Local terrorist groups such as the notorious Boko Haram (which means western education is evil) continue to terrorize several innocent people especially in the northern parts of the country.
Besides the deadly HIV/AIDS, the deadly malaria, bacterial and protozoal diarrhea, yellow fever, sleeping sickness, Ebola (Nigeria is now Ebola-free), etc. continue to threaten several lives in Nigeria today. According the World Health Organization, more than 26.7% of Nigerian children under the age 5 were underweight in 2008.
Environmental degradation (gradual deterioration of the environment) including soil degradation (caused mainly by oil spills especially in the Niger Delta areas. Oil spillage poisons food sources and water bodies in most of these areas), rapid deforestation, air and water pollution especially in urban areas, desertification (especially in the northern parts), rapid urbanization (which puts much pressure on available resources), etc. remain some of the major environmental issues facing Nigeria today.

IGBO-ISRAEL: ORIGINS, HISTORY AND CULTURE.

This brief survey introduces the Igbo people, traces the origin of the Igbo people, and talks about why the Igbos must invest all their energy, strength and resources to know who they are, and reconnect to their source.
Presently the Igbos are a sub-Saharan African people numbering up to 40 millions that are autochthonous/indigenous in the territory that is currently called the South East of Nigeria. The term ‘South East’ is a political designation. The South East in Nigeria means the area called the ‘core’ Igbo states. These are Abia, Anambra, Ebonyi, Enugu and Imo. These states are also regarded, and referred to as the Igbo heartland.
There are also Igbos that are autochthonous/ indigenous in Edo, Delta, and Rivers states of Nigeria.
The Igbos are Igbos today, but what were they before they became Igbos? The word ‘Igbo’ is helpful in the quest to answer the question.
The tribal/national name of the people in discussion ‘Ibo; or ‘Igbo’ is derived from Ibri. Interestingly a foreigner dropped the hint which helped me to unravel the puzzle, in my opinion.
According to the foreigner; one of the missionaries who worked in Igboland: ‘All my attempts to trace the origin of the name Ibo have been unsuccessful. My most reliable informants have been able to offer no other alternative than that it is most probably an abbreviation of a longer name connected with an ancestor long since forgotten.’3
Abraham is the ancestor of Israel. And Abraham was specifically referred to as ‘Abram the Hebrew’ (Gen.14:13). Many Igbos have suggested that the word ‘Ibo’ which virtually all non Igbos use to address the Igbos is a corruption of ‘Hebrew.’ I know that they mean Ibri or Ivri which are the Hebrew language equivalents of Hebrew which itself is a Greek-Latin-English translation of Ibri or Ivri.
If as Genesis 14:13 posited, Abram is the Ibri. And his descendants from Isaac and Jacob went on to retain the name ha-Ibri (the Hebrews), we do not have to go far to know where the name/word ‘Igbo’ came from. The people known as the Jews today were known as the Israelites, and also as ha Ibri (the Hebrews), after their ancestors Israel and Abraham. All that we have seen in Igbo culture indicate that the Igbos emanated from the twelve tribes of Israel. Logic tells the rest of the story. It is a tradition for the Igbos to bear the names of their ancestors. All Igbos are from one clan or the other, and all the clans or most of them bear the names of their ancestors/founders, or at least names formed from those of the founding fathers or in a few cases mothers. One could ask; why won’t the Igbo people as a whole assume the name of their ancestor- ha Ibri? Listening to a modern Jew pronounce Ibri, you would conclude that he/she is saying Igbo. With all the aforesaid we can say that the Igbos simply retained the earliest name of/designation for the people of Israel, and the name that all the tribes would feel comfortable with. Perceptive modern Jews have observed that Igbos may feel more comfortable if identified as Hebrews rather than as Jews, because they didn’t all descend from the Jews (from the tribe of Judah). This deserves more talk though. The term ‘Jew’ is also used to represent the Israelites and the Hebrews presently, just as England stands for Great Britain, and the United Kingdom. And the U.S.A., and Russia respectively stand and stood for the American continent, and the defunct U.S.S.R.
So the above having been said and done with I repeat that the Igbos are of Hebraic descent. 99.9% of the Igbos know that the Igbos came from Israel. One would be right to wonder about why 0.1 % of the Igbos would not know about their origins. The explanations would be multifaceted. One could say that all the Igbos know that the Igbos were Hebrews a few years ago, because the knowledge of who the Igbos are was more in previous years, and in fact it recedes year by year. Knowledgeable Igbo elders who did not have the benefit of the European type education that became fashionable after the British conquest and colonization of the Igbos knew that the Igbo people are ha Ibri (Hebrews), because their fathers told them. I talked with some of them at Nri clan, and preserved their testimonies for posterity in the Igbo Israel Video Interview series. Today the knowledge is receding because Igbo history as a subject of instruction has been absent from the curricula of all the educational and religious institutions that have ‘catered’ to the ‘needs’ of the Igbos, since the Igbos were defeated and colonized. A close reading of the earlier works of Chinua Achebe, John Munonye, Chukwuemeka Ike, and Remy Chukwukaodinaka Ilona will reveal that the Igbo people began to develop feelings of inferiority, and self-hate, after the colonial authorities had intervened, and branded Igbo culture pagan.
The event or process that I described above led to severe losses. The same can be said about most of the mass media that have sold their products to the Igbo people. Save the National Times newspaper, no newspaper in Nigeria talks about Igbo history and culture. And Nollywood! The film industry which was built up with Igbo sweat and money but which the Igbo builders have virtually handed over to people from the competing peoples of Nigeria, because the Igbo film marketers/producers as they are called want to make money. Nollywood has excelled! It has excelled in distorting Igbo history, and ridiculing the Igbos! Even though Omenana has room for egalitarianism and republicanism only, Igbo film-makers specialize in making ’Igbo films’, which portray this Igbos as corrupt feudalists with still more corrupt monarchies. And interestingly as the film producers stray they get more destructive. Presently they use non Igbo film actors to play the roles of Igbo ‘kings’. So would anybody be surprised if a few Igbos do not know that the Igbos are Israelites. And a great majority of those that know that the Igbos are Israelites do not know that Omenana 9Igbo culture) is Israelite culture, i.e, their knowledge of their origins is not really meaningful, because they do not know what Omenana is, and that the Hebrew Bible is extracted from Omenana. However there is a minority that retain the knowledge that the Igbos are Jews, as the modern Hebrew is more regularly addressed, in a meaningful way, i.e, they know that the Igbos are Jewish, and that that sets them apart as people of God, and gives them the responsibility to live differently from their neighbours; i.e, demands that they live according to the dictates of the Written and Oral Laws of God (the Hebrew Bible, the Talmud, the Mishna and the Gemarra). This minority is the Igbo-Israel.
This minority is working to heal the Igbo people, and rebuild Igbo intellectual, spiritual, and material heritage.
I have been privileged to work with this section of the Igbos. That the Igbo people are in trouble is the best kept secret in the world. In Nigeria the catch-phrases for the Igbos today is ‘Igbo problem’, and ‘marginalization’. Where the Igbos live in exile the story is not different. The situation is bad to the extent that it prompted an Igbo intellectual, one of the most productive minds of the Igbos; who lives in the United States to write the following missive:

“Anybody who sees the Igbo situation in simple linear perspectiveeither is ignorant of the profound realities or dishonest. The Igbohas entered an emergency phase, and it requires good old political andsocial organizing to restore it. One of the most critical problems inAla-Igbo today is the nature of its human and ecological environment:social instability - that is, difficulties in the prospects ofsettling has made it impossible for Igbo young men and women now tomarry at the natural age - between 25-35. Young men now marry at theaverage age of 40 years. Many Igbo women are without prospects ofmarriage, having crossed certain thresholds. The implication is that45% of Igbo people are not reproducing a new generation. Those who getmarried are suffering from curious stages of infertility as a resultof environmental degradation and chemical pollution- through oilexploration activities and groundwater toxification. Anepidemiological survey carried out in the whole of Igbo land todaywill reveal a most deadly truth: a huge number of the Igbo are dyingfrom AIDS, new forms of Cancer, and Diabetes - from poor nutrition.These are issues that we must address holistically because they flowfrom the nature of the relationship between the PEOPLE and theirgovernment. The Igbo themselves have not sat down to confront theirelected representatives with an action plan, and with suggestions ofthe means to carry it out, and a timeline and oversight. The problemof insecurity occasioned by new waves of kidnapping only complicatesthis: but to put this simply, our greatest problem is not the problemof this new wave of selective and directed terrorism. It is that theIgbo as a people have learnt to be DEPENDENT on some external factor orfigure whom they expect to solve their problems. I have said thisbefore, WE ARE ALL GUILTY - either by silence, inaction, or directcomplicity.All those who wish to participate in the restoration and rebuilding ofIgbo land must begin to re-think our relationships with that land.Anaghi ano uti agba ntele ukwu. We must get active”.
The situation is as bad, or even worse than as portrayed in the missive above, but only some elements among the Igbo-Israel have really seen the handwriting on the wall. That there is danger! That there is no time to waste! The generality of the Igbos feel helpless, because they are helpless. Disarmed by ignorance, and illiteracy in Igbo studies, Igbos with even post-graduate degrees do not know what to say or do to stem the decline of the Igbo nation. Fortunately Igbo-Israel is growing!
In recognition of the above problems, and inspired by the action plan and road map laid out in books: The Igbos: Jews In Africa-With Solutions To The Most Critical Igbo Problems and Introduction To The Chronicles Of Igbo Israel-And The Connections Between The Afro Americans and the Jews, a group of Igbo scholars, professionals, businessmen, artistes, and bureaucrats have come together as The Igbo Origin and Culture Research Society to contribute to the positive growth and development of the Igbo people, and Igboland. The Society will very likely present its programmes to the Igbo people in the month of October, in 2010. It will use the opportunity to present some of the afore-mentioned books and premiere the Igbo-Israel Video Interview to the Igbo, Jewish and general public. It is also organizing an Igbo summit where solutions would be found to many of the ills that plague ndi Igbo today; such as brother kidnapping of brother which is alien to Igbo culture. In addition it will also appraise ndi Igbo about some programmes that it is working on; such as the preservation of the Igbo migration story in film. And the Igbo-Israel International Music Festival, an initiative of Moore Black Chi Mmadike, an Igbo reggae artiste, and Vice President (International) Igbo-Israel Union (Society), who is based in Australia.

The truth about Igbo origin

The truth about Igbo origin

There have been various tales of Igbo origin, some true and others false. Those true are, stories from Onu Igbo (from the mouth of Igbo without outside influencing); however, those that are false are, either unintentional and due to the lack of traditional history and foreign exploitation, or intentional and due to the works of dubious foreign entities who prey on people who have witnessed oppression and are deemed fit to be used as tools for a selfish agenda.
The Igbo are orally and archeologically proven to have migrated from no other area apart from the Niger-Benue confluence. It is this area that blood related groups such as the Yoruba, Idoma, Edo (Bini, Esan, Urhobo/Isoko, Etsako, Afemai), and Igala dispersed into various groups. The Igbo have no tradition of coming from anywhere else other than the nuclear Igbo area of the Owerri-Awka- Orlu-Okigwe axis, which happens to support the archeological findings.

The Falsity of Jewish ancestry

There have been attempts by various Zionist Jewish entities to try and sew Ndi Igbo into a “Jewish” ancestry. One of their deceptions is through the painting of the Biblical Eri and the Igbo Eri as one in the same. Those who are well versed in the Holy Bible, Igbo Traditions, and history as I, know that this claim is totally and grossly absurd. To begin, the names Eri (the son of Gad) of the Bible and Eri of the Igbo race are pronounced two completely different ways. The ‘E’ of the Biblical/Jewish Eri is equivalent to the ‘e’ in Easter and the ‘ri’ is equivalent to the ‘ri’ in ride. Examples of similar biblical names with long ‘E’ pronunciations are Elijah(ee LIE ja), Elisha(ee LIE sha), Egypt(ee jippt), and Esau(ee SAW). In contrast, the ‘E’ in the Igbo Eri is as the ‘e’ in echo and the ‘ri’ is as the ‘ree’ in reed. Examples of similar Igbo names with short ‘E’ pronunciations are Emeka, Enyi, Ebere, and Enugu. The only thing the Biblical/Jewish Eri shares with the Igbo Eri is the Latin Script in which it is written in. This is a major deception that is used on the Igbo who are unable to acquire access to the truth.
Another reason why the claim of the Biblical Eri and the Igbo Eri as one in the same is laughable is both the Bible and Igbo tradition prove it to be false. The biblical Eri (the son of Gad) was said to have been born during the biblical times of Genesis. The Book of Genesis is said to have been written in 1400 BC. That is over 1,400 years before Jesus Christ was even born. The Bible itself was completed roughly 2,000 years ago, so the time difference between the completion of the Holy Bible and the birth of the biblical/Jewish Eri is enormous. Do keep in mind that the completion of the Book of Genesis was a collection of records of events over thousands of years, according to religious doctrine and beliefs. In Contrast to the years of the biblical/Jewish Eri, the Igbo Eri is barely over 1,000 years old. Eri was the father of Nri, who establish a kingdom between 948-1000 AD and lasted in major influence up till 1911. Obviously Igbo and Jewish faithful are being taken for a ride. The two figureheads were two completely different individuals and had no connection whatsoever. Also, the Igbo Eri is not the progenitor of the Igbo race. He is the father of the Nri, Aguleri, and Umuleri clans of the Igbo race. Trying to link the entire Igbo race to this one man/figure is another attempt to sew the Igbo into Jewish ancestry. In fact, the Igbo are from a land of vegetation and have no tradition of migrating from anywhere outside the Niger-Benue Confluence; however, the Jews believe they migrated from a place known as “The Garden of Eden”, a place of vegetation and which they are yet to find the location of this particular place of origin of theirs. Going by the facts I just stated, if there is any of the two groups that is the ancestor of the other it is the Igbo that would be the ancestor of the Jews.
“While these Eastern theories of Igbo origin have been rejected by African historians as a worthless piece of creative imagination, “the theory resurfaced during the Biafra-Nigeria Civil War (1967 – 1970) when the Igbo race nearly accepted the suggestion that they were Israelites or Jews. This was because the Igbos associated the mass destruction of the Civilian Igbo race living in the Northern region of Nigeria with the genocide of the Jews in Nazi .Germany during the Second World War. The Biafrans of the Nigerian civil war also attributed the source of hatred for both Jews in Europe and the Igbos in Nigeria to their enterprising nature, economic and intellectual capability which were seen by others as an attempt to monopolize the economic and political power of the nation.”
As Emma Onwuzurike remarked in Nguma Uvuru (1991): “This unfortunate incident compounded the problem of Igbo origin. It even pressed the Jewish origin almost to a convincing point. However, the Hebrew or Jewish origin of the Igbos is part of the basic theory of Nigerian people origin which has been discarded by African historians as an unauthentic theory”

The decline of Judaism and the hope of its resurrection

There is an agenda to spread Jewish culture and religion throughout Africa, and Igboland in particular. This is an agenda due to the reality that out of the three Abrahamic religions (Christianity, Islam, and Judaism), Christianity and Islam are on the rise and at an astounding rate to the point many Jews are crossing over to the two religions. What does this mean? It means Jewish culture and religion is slowly being eaten up and withered away. This is where to fraudulent Zionist Jews come in, who I repeat, do not represent average Jew. In order to revive their culture and religion they have to spread and for now, Africa is the greatest breeding ground for that. Africa is a place where many are oppressed and low self-esteem is prevalent. The ethnic groups in Africa that these Jews, who don’t represent the masses, target are those who have been battered and ostracized by fellow countrymen as the Igbo of Nigeria have been. The Zionist Jews have gone as far as to use the deaths of over 3 million Igbo people (before, during, and after the Biafra War) and the destruction of the Igbo race by the Nigerian government as comparison to the Jewish Holocaust as a way of drawing more support for their colonization agenda. In the process of the agenda and spreading Jewish culture, they intend to completely wipe out Igbo culture and Language and replace Igbo with that of the Jews. For instance, an organization by the name of Yitzhak Rabin for African Development is to construct an International Institute/ Resource Center, for the teaching of Hebrew language, the history of the Jewish nation, and other science related courses(according to Jewish doctrine) in Port Harcourt, Rivers State.​ This is despicable and unacceptable.

The denial of Christ

Jesus Christ as called by Christian or Jesus the son of Mary as called by Muslims is a being held dear to both Christianity and Islam. To Christians, Jesus Christ is not only the Messiah, the light, truth, and the way to salvation, but he is also God in the flesh. To Muslims, Jesus the son of Mary is a prophet, pure, and sent by Allah into the world through a virgin birth. Jesus is one held in high veneration in both Christianity and Islam and both religions believe that if you reject him you reject God or Allah. However, Judaism completely rejects Jesus as one sent from the Almighty God. In Judaism he is seen as no more than a teacher and believed to have been a fraud that died because of blasphemy. This is a belief that must be accepted in order to be a follower of Judaism- the rejection of Christ. Pulling children away from the WORD of God is one of the goals, an act that both the Holy Bible and the Holy Qur’an warns against. Such blasphemes must be rejected. As of present, there are synagogues in Igboland in which are used to deceive Christian Igbos into Judaism. These synagogues are the one Igbo Christians are brought to in which a phony teaching of Christ is taught. These particular synagogues are preludes to the bigger deception of completely denying Jesus Christ. It is put in place to slowly pull the Christian Igbo away from Christ because they know trying to have a faithful Christian denounce Christ right away is highly unlikely. The game is to relate to the Christian Igbo, make him think they are not against his belief but instead have a different point of view, and then take him to the main synagogue in which the total denial of Christ/ Jesus the son of Mary is completed. The Igbo Muslim population is also targeted in this similar manner but the tendency is very slim. We must reject this In the Name of God.

Respect of Identity

Both Christianity and Islam have entered into Igboland without the need of Christians or Muslims to rewrite Igbo history in order to promote its religion and win over converts. Jews do not have to do the opposite in order to reach this goal. Ndi Igbo are not against Judaism in Igbo land but we are unrepentantly against the revision of our history. We Igbo have suffered enough, not just genocide, and are fed up with those taking our kindness for weakness. Let this be a plea and a warning for those fraudulent elements to stand clear of Igbo land or meet your waterloo.
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The Role of ICT in Teaching and Learning

To go back in time, the first commercial computer was launched only 60 years ago and the first microcomputers appeared in schools about 30 years later. Schools up to that time could mostly be described as traditional, having changed little from the learning institutions of 100 years or so previously. But these first microcomputers were beginning to bring about gradual change in classrooms as recorded in a UNESCO publication, Developing Computer Use in Education (1986). This time may be considered as a baseline; the beginning of the use of ICT in schools – termed the emerging stage.

To jump to the present, we see today the linking of computers across the world. The year 1996 may be remembered as the year that the Internet made its initial, far-reaching impact, on learning institutions and on much of the rest of human activity. Today’s web of computers and what we call ICT (Information and Communication Technologies) have since proliferated to such a degree that they impact on virtually every aspect of our daily lives. Our schools and teacher education institutions and the nature of learning and teaching are witnessing a paradigm shift brought about by the use of ICT. Schools have moved well beyond the emerging stage to what are termed in another UNESCO publication the applying and infusing stages in their use and adoption of ICT.

As we look forward in time, what directions do we see for the future of ICT? Five predictions have been made. The digitising of human knowledge, cloud computing, social networking, touch-screen technology, and the convergence of mobile and PC technologies are developments on the education horizon. A device yet to be invented may be given the name iCT. What will be the impact of these newer ICT on education? Will education have gone beyond the infusing stage to the transforming stage? And perhaps the most important question of all, how do we prepare the next generation of teachers for such a future? UNESCO Headquarters in Paris is about to publish Teacher Development in an E-learning Age, a book containing a four-strand learning model for teacher development that may be a potentially useful template for teacher education programmes in an e-learning age and also may assist in shedding light on the transforming role of ICT on teaching and learning.

Information Technology In Nigeria the way forward

Information Technology In Nigeria the way forward

ICT in Nigeria: The way forward 

 

There is no doubt that Nigeria's growth in ICT in the past few years has been enormous. Thanks to Engr Charles Ndukwe( CEO Nigerina Communication Commission).
But the journey is still far. The Teledensity is still low considering the enormous resources at our disposal(Oil, human capital,etc).
In my studyI found out the impediments to the growth of ICT could not be unconnected with the following problems:

 
POVERTY
Nigeria is listed among the poorest nations in the world despite being the 6th largest oil producing country in the world! Larger percentage of Nigerians live below poverty level($1 per day). It will difficult for people that cannot meet their basic needs to crave for or welcome technology.

CORRUPTION
This is the worst disease the Country is battling with. In my opinion( I stand to be corrected), corruption has done more damage to Nigerians than HIV/AIDS! Our government has been paying lip service to fight against corruption. Even the administration under the leadership of Chief Olusegun Obasanjo tried to fight the menace but unfortunately the tool(EFCC) that was created to fight corruption was turned into political tool. Worst still the close associates and members of his cabinet were among the most corrupt people in the country. No wonder the last election was the worst in the history of Nigeria.
 
 ILLITERACY
As a matter of facts illiteracy level in Nigeria is on the increase. the earning power of Nigerians are dropping courtesy of low renumeration and incessant increase in petroleum products. Most Nigerians could hardly send their wards to Schools. teachers are being owed back logged 'salary'. Pensioners dies on the queue to get their stipends. ASUU had been on strike for over 3 months. It would hard for people that not acquired enough formal education to embrace technology. This was evident during preparation toward 2007 election when the majority of the populace kicked against electronic voting system.

HIGH IMPORT DUTIES
The telecommunications firms in Nigeria often says the reasons why call tariffs is high is because high import duties. Same things affect the ISPs.

NCC LICENSES &FEES

The high cost of licenses and fees form NCC is another impediment to the growth of ICT in Nigeria.

Way forward:
The economic reforms should impact positively on the average Nigerians.
Nigerian government should increase the budgetary allocation to education to 30% of our annual budget.
Corruption should dealt with. EFCC should be truly made independent. If corruption is not dealt with even recently introduced IT fund will go the way of PTDF.


If all these problems could be tackled, then Nigeria will close up on the 1st world nations in ICT.

solution to unemployment in nigeria


Background
NOIPolls has been evaluating opinions of Nigerians on the most important issues that need to be addressed. In the last eight polls over the seven-year period, the results have revealed the top issue for policy focus to be “Job Creation. This cannot be overemphasized especially with the unfortunate deaths of about 7 – 18 youths nationwide (actual number to be confirmed) in search for a decent job at the Nigerian Immigration Service (NIS) on Saturday 15 March 2014. It was estimated that at least 520,000 youths registered with N1,000 application fee with the hope of getting a position out of the about 5,000 job openings declared by NIS.
In all of this, the International Monetary Fund (IMF) is predicting Nigeria’s Gross Domestic Product (GDP) to grow at 7.3% this year while inflation will continue its downward path to 7%? Why is job creation still an issue? The answer: Headline economic growth is not enough. Inclusive growth that meets the expectations of citizens (at all levels) is needed more than ever before.
From experience, the only way to achieve job creation and inclusive growth is by tapping into the many innovations of the private sector, particularly Small and Medium Enterprises (SMEs). An army of about 50 million SMEs creating about 500 million jobs between 1980 and 2012 led the Chinese economic miracle. However, against international best practices Nigeria is rated poorly. For Nigeria to sustainably create jobs and forge inclusive growth, the solution is the robust growth and scaling of SMEs.
I am burdened when we I read or hear quotes about SMEs from both public and private authorities – “We have about 17 million registered SMEs, and they employ over 32 million Nigerians.”  This is a myth and the following data proves this.

The 182-page Nigerian Bureau of Statistics/Small and Medium Enterprise Development Agency of Nigeria (NBS/SMEDAN) 2010 National MSME Collaborative Survey reveals the following:
  • 17,284,671 MSMEs in Nigeria. The breakdown shows that micro businesses constitutes about 17,261,753 or 99.87%, the small enterprises accounted for about 21, 264 or 0.12%, while the medium scale enterprises is about 1, 654 or 0.01%. Hence, SMEs are only 22,918 representing 0.13%.
  • 32,414,884 employment created by MSMEs. SMEs created 39,478 jobs representing 0.12%.
The International Labour Organisation (ILO) in 2013 has the following statistics:
  • ILO noted that with 53% of new employment, Nigeria’s informal sector (i.e. micro businesses), constituted by over 17 million businesses, led the growth in total jobs creation.
  • ILO also noted that in spite of the positive developments in the jobs market, unemployment rate is 24% with youth unemployment accounting for 38% of total unemployment.
The truth about SMEs in Nigeria is that the sector does not currently account for job creation and inclusive growth.
I would like to bring forward another fact worth considering. “Do the over 32 million job opportunities created largely by micro enterprises help to raise incomes, increase living standards, and improve lives?”
Wearing my HR practitioner hat and my years of experience recruiting for SMEs, I have consistently surveyed jobseekers about their definition of a job that will improve their lives. From the responses, this is the summary of the definition they provided:
  • A salary at least three times the National minimum wage
  • Benefits such as: Health Insurance, Group Life Assurance, Pension and National Housing Scheme
  • Access to annual leave and leave allowance
  • Access to training and development
  • Access to welfare programs
  • A monthly PAYSLIP that can help them access consumer credit from banks
If we review the 32 million jobs created, how many can actually be categorized as a “job” based on this definition? This is the reason over 100,000 youths in Lagos alone will be looking to NIS for a decent job. This is also the reason that ILO launched the global “Decent Work For Youth” campaign. Hence, I have decided to contribute my quota in providing solutions to this situation we have found ourselves in Nigeria.

The Way Forward
1. Policy makers need to commit themselves to the creation of a business environment that is conducive to facilitating SME growth and development.
There are several business environment issues (multiple taxation, infrastructure, etc) that affect SMEs. But let’s take the nagging issue of Power/Electricity as an example. This singular issue is responsible for the death of several SMEs in Nigeria. For instance, the manufacturing sector that accounts for the largest segment of SMEs (according to the 2010 NBS/SMEDAN Survey) is the hardest hit. 90% of this sector is run by SMEs but contributes just 1% to GDP. I was privileged to be the Consultant (ENABLE, funded by DfID) that worked with the Nigerian Association for Small and Medium Enterprises (NASME) on the Public Private Dialogue (PPD) with Nigerian Electricity Regulatory Council (NERC) on the “IMPACT OF MULTI-YEAR TARRIF ORDER II (MYTO II) ON MICRO, SMALL & MEDIUM ENTERPRISES (MSMEs)”.
The PPD was as a result of complaints by NASME members on how the fixed charge element of the MYTO II Tariff structure implemented for manufacturers (i.e. D2 category) was impacting their business. NOIPolls was commissioned to conduct research and fieldwork in all the geo-political zones – Lagos, Abuja, Cross River, Bauchi and Imo. 138 interviews were conducted and 127 were used in the analysis. The result revealed that all manufacturers whether a large business or an SME were subject to pay the same fixed charge for power whether they utilized it or not. So we had cases of fixed charges in Lagos being around N97,000 and as high as N107,000 in Kano. This fixed tariff has to be paid whether there is power supply or not. The implications were so bad that a survey respondent had resulted to cutting jobs worth the N97,000 and overwork his existing staff to produce the same quantity. This was because consumers were not willing to bear the cost, through a product price increase.
At the PPD, the NERC Chairman, Sam Amadi after seeing the evidence-based presentation indicated that this would be reviewed. At the Stakeholder’s Forum on 23 May 2013, Sam Amadi pronounced a 75% reduction in fixed charge tariffs for SMEs. Since the privatization exercise, the DISCOs have not implemented this pronouncement. NASME is now attempting to work at the Consumer Forum levels with the 11 DISCOs nationwide to chart a way forward but this is still at the infancy stage. How are SMEs (especially manufacturers) supposed to grow and create jobs in this situation?
2. Create interventions that will support the start-up, growth and scaling of SMEs
There are a few (I’ve actually not heard of any) interventions that focus on successfully growing SMEs that contribute to sustainable economic growth in a transition economy like Nigeria. Growth, if not properly managed, can overwhelm a business, destroying value and in many cases even causing the business to fail especially with the business environment we have in Nigeria. There are several SMEs in Nigeria that growth was responsible for their failure. SME interventions in this area should be the focus of policy makers and not only interventions and programs that will create more micro businesses.
In another project as a Consultant (ENABLE, funded by DfID), I was part of the team that trained staff of the new MSME desk created by the Lagos State Ministry of Commerce & Industry on MSME Development for the State. During this project, I was privy to read the proposed National MSME Policy for Nigeria. The objectives of the Policy can be summarized as follows:
  • Accelerating the profitable expansion of existing MSMEs along the chain of development thereby enabling them to increase their contribution to GDP and employment generation by ensuring that Micro businesses become Small; Small businesses become Medium; and Medium businesses become Large
  • Fostering the emergence of new MSMEs in Nigeria, especially among Women and Youth.
We are on the right path with the policy objectives. Is policy enough? We need to carefully think through the implementation plan especially along the lines of SMEs. We cannot keep falling into the trap of supporting just micro businesses while we leave SMEs to keep dying if we want to create jobs.

Conclusion
Its time to take the bull by the horn and I am calling on our leaders to focus on how we can start, grow and scale SMEs in our country to forge inclusive growth and create jobs. We particularly need extensive efforts in the creation of strategic policies, institutions and efficient and effective investments that will grow the real SMEs in Nigeria if we want to solve this unemployment challenge. We cannot continue to front micro business support as SME interventions.
W-Holistic Business solutions in its little way through its solutions has assisted in creating and sustaining over 1,000 decent jobs. We’re staying true to our mission:
“To help entrepreneurs succeed so they can attract investment, create jobs, grow sustainable economies, offer customers better products and services, realize great personal satisfaction and wealth, and fund programs that make the world a better place.”
My final advice for SMEs in Nigeria to succeed so that we can continue to create jobs for our teeming youth is to  “identify your market, and develop a business model that can work in the environment that you are in, and continue to innovate.”
What are your thoughts on how to solve the unemployment challenge in Nigeria? Thoughts from our international audience and Nigerians in Diaspora are also welcome.

To your success!
Olanrewaju Oniyitan

How To Love Someone Who Will Never Love You Back

First, resign yourself to reality: they will never love you back. Either they do not know you exist, or you will never actually know each other, or they simply don’t think of you in any other way than the way they do right now. Your feelings cannot change this. You changing yourself cannot change this.
They will never love you back.
It’s a harsh pill to swallow, but you’ll do it, because there’s no other choice. It will feel like a badge of honor, a punishment you take as your own burden, because you cannot choose who you love (or so you tell yourself), and that works both ways. You cannot unchoose to love them, because you have tried and you have failed. They cannot choose to love you. It wouldn’t be fair to expect one of them without expecting the same of yourself.
So you will continue through your life, walk through your day — interact with them if you must — and feel like a martyr for the cause. You’ll think you’re ridiculous for it, of course — you know you should not love them — but here you are, unable to get over them. You will listen to sad love songs and watch sad romance movies and read sad books and see yourself in every unloved lover, every girl who pined for someone and every guy who stayed there nobly throughout it all.
You are going to hate yourself for being so cliché.
But you will carry that like your burden. You will balk when people actually like you back, because you will have become so accustomed to this fate — this not being loved back — that it will shock you when you actually do get attention from someone. That someone could like you in the way that you like someone else. You won’t understand, and you’ll turn them down, and say that you are taken. Or you’re not interested. Or it’s not the best time for you. Anything to let them down gently, because you know what it’s like to be rejected. Still, though, you will wonder. What do they see in me? Am I likable? Is this pity? If this one person likes me, why can’t someone else?
It will gnaw at you.
You will ask your friends. What’s wrong with you. What you could fix. What you could change. Where you come up short and what you could improve and how you could trick them into thinking you’re the one they want, if only for a little while. You will bargain with yourself, change your clothes, cut your hair, put on airs and like new bands and books and movies. You will try, and feel like a fraud at first — but then, slowly, you will believe yourself. You will think you’re actually this person, because this person is someone who could be loved back, maybe.
Your friends will call you an idiot, and that nothing is wrong with you, and that the person who deserves you will take you just as you are, and you will nod and agree and call them sweet, and try to believe them, but you’ll still feel flawed. Lacking. Wanting. They’re your friends. They’re supposed to already like you. They don’t get it.
You will forget that everyone has their someone, their missed chance, their could-have-been. You will forget that you have given your friends this advice, too, and felt badly for them when they tried to change their whole lives around people who would never be a part of the picture.
But slowly, you will grow tired of the charade, and miss the old you. You will pick up all your bad habits again, the comfortable grooves of being a flawed person that made you so interesting in the first place. You will go on dates, and never tell these dates that you are comparing them to someone else the whole time, but you will try. You will laugh and flirt and kiss and sleep with other people, you will push them out of your mind. You will replace them, and wall up that space in your heart where they live, trying to keep them from getting out.
Because slowly, you will realize that this person who never loved you back is an idea. That’s all they ever were. You did not know them well enough to love them — you projected who you thought they were onto their body, and greedily took that and ran with it. Because they did not love you back, you never did learn how they wanted to be loved. You might have loved them, but they never asked you to do that.
Even martyrs sometimes fight for the wrong cause.
Love someone who will never love you back. Want someone you can never have. Listen to pop songs about unrequited love and leaving boyfriends and girlfriends for new horizons. Wallow in everything unrequited. But even though you cannot choose who you fall in love with, you get to choose the things you dwell on. Wall up that space in your heart. Try to move on. Don’t turn that love into wasted energy. And if you truly cannot force yourself to move on, spend that time loving yourself in the meanwhile.
Somebody should love you back. Why can’t it be you? TC mark

How To Love Someone

I’m not talking about the kind of love that comes in passionate sweeping ecstatic bits. I’m not talking about the love that leaves us breathless with hormonally-infused and socially projected chemical responses that we’re doing something right. I don’t mean the love that takes us far from where we started, but that which brings us back, and that which acquaints us with who we are. Not the outbursts of passion that drive us to madness. Not the false pretenses under which we fall into believing we’ll never survive without someone– not the love we attach ourselves to for the sake of self-assurance. Not the feeling that drives us to the obsessive and compulsive withholding of someone, but the love that fills us up and lets them go.
Love someone genuinely. Love the funny little things about them. Reassure them. Let your time together be an experience, not a chore or a social staple proving your worth. Love is not within itself a nasty, manipulating thing, but we become nasty, manipulating people when we hold onto the kind of love that we falsely believe is the only way we can feel that sense of worth.
You have to love someone for who they are, who they were, and who they have the potential to become– even if you don’t always love all of those different people. Even if you don’t agree with what they’ve done. Even if you’re not sure about where they’re going. Love them because their souls are worth loving. Reach inside of them and make them feel. Show them the unhealed parts of themselves, and hold their hand while they start the journey to accepting them.
We think of love as though we are destined for a happily ever after, and that it’s only a matter of finding someone else to give it to us. Happily ever after will be infiltrated with illness, death, suffering, sadness, but also great achievement, excitement, adventure and growth. Love is the person you want to be next to you at your parent’s funeral, and who you want to vacation with in the summer. It is not the person who gives you a high. It’s the person who speaks to your soul without speaking at all. It’s the person you don’t know why you love, but you do. Sometimes, even, it’s against all of your better ideas to love them, but you do. Love without reason, and love without condition, is the stuff we’re looking for.
People do not come into your life to fill roles and give you happy days with flawless execution and tireless dedication. Love is a constantly flowing, understanding and patient equilibrium between two people who recognize in one another something deeper than that which they see in others. Learn to see love with your soul, not your heart, and give it from there as well.
Love someone with the same forgiving, honest, vulnerable rawness that makes you lose your breath a little. Love someone because they challenge you, and they make you want to be better. Love someone because their soul inspires you, not because you’re interested in the relief from loneliness and companionship they can provide. Anybody can do that. Not just anybody can show you to yourself.

The 10 Secrets of Happy Couples

10 Secrets Happy Couples
They might be 30, or 75. They come in all colors, shapes, sizes and income brackets. It doesn’t matter how long they’ve been together. Whatever the demographics, when you see a happy couple, you just know it!
How do these couples stay in love, in good times and in bad? Fortunately, the answer isn’t through luck or chance. As a result of hard work and commitment, they figure out the importance of the following relationship “musts.” Because few couples know about all of the musts, I think of them as the relationship “secrets.”

Happy Couples and Their Secrets

1. Develop a realistic view of committed relationships.
Recognize that the crazy infatuation you experienced when your romance was new won’t last. A deeper, richer relationship, and one that should still include romance, will replace it. A long-term relationship has ups and downs, and expecting it will be all sunny and roses all the time is unrealistic.
2. Work on the relationship.
An untended garden develops weeds that can ultimately kill even the heartiest plants. And so it is with relationships. It is important to address problems and misunderstandings immediately. Some people believe good relationships just happen naturally. The truth is that a good relationship, like anything you want to succeed in life, must be worked on and tended to on a regular basis. Neglect the relationship, and it will often go downhill.
3. Spend time together.
There is no substitute for shared quality time. When you make a point of being together, without kids, pets and other interruptions, you will form a bond that will get you through life’s rough spots. Time spent together should be doing a shared activity, not just watching television.
4. Make room for “separateness.”
Perhaps going against conventional wisdom, spending time apart is also an important component of a happy relationship. It is healthy to have some separate interests and activities and to come back to the relationship refreshed and ready to share your experiences. Missing your partner helps remind you how important he or she is to you.
5. Make the most of your differences.
Stop and think: What most attracted you to your partner at the beginning? I’ll almost guarantee that it was exactly the thing that drives you most insane today. Take a fresh look at these differences. Try to focus on their positive aspects and find an appreciation for those exact things that make the two of you different from one another. It’s likely that your differences balance one another out and make you a great team.
6. Don’t expect your partner to change; but at the same time give them more of what they want.
If both you and your partner stop trying to change each other, you will eliminate the source of most of your arguments. At the same time, each of you should focus on giving one another more of what you know the other person wants, even if it doesn’t come naturally. For instance, instead of complaining how your partner never cleans out the dishwasher, try just doing it yourself once in awhile without complaint. Your partner will likely notice your effort and make more of an effort themselves around the house. If you do both of these things at once you’ve got a winning plan!
7. Accept that some problems can’t be solved.
There may be issues upon which you cannot agree. Rather than expending wasted energy, agree to disagree, and attempt to compromise or to work around the issue. Two people cannot spend years together without having legitimate areas of disagreement. The test of a happy relationship is how they choose to work through such issues — through compromise, change, or finding it’s just not that important to stew over.
8. Communicate!
Lack of communication is the number one reason even good relationships fail. And here is a useful format for doing so, especially when dealing with incendiary topics: Listen to your partner’s position, without interrupting him or her. Just listen. When he or she is finished, summarize what you heard him or her say. If you can, empathize with your significant other even though you don’t agree. This will take your partner off of the defensive, and make it easier for them to hear your thoughts and feelings. It’s hard to argue when you use this format, and best of all, you may come up with an understanding or a solution.
9. Honesty is essential.
You may share with your partner the things he or she doesn’t want to hear. Better this than to have him or her doubt your honesty. Mistrust is one of the key deal breakers in relationships. And once trust is lost or broken, it can take a very long time to re-establish it in the relationship.The happiest couples are the ones where honesty is as natural and every day as breathing.
10. Respect your partner, and don’t take him or her for granted.
Treating your sweetheart with respect is likely to get you the same in return. And regularly reminding them how much they mean to you will enrich your relationship in indescribable ways. When you say, “I love you,” pause for a moment to really mean it. And don’t be afraid to express your feelings of appreciation with your partner — he or she will be thankful that you did.
Making these secrets an integral part of your relationship won’t be easy. In fact, your efforts may initially seem like planted seeds that never come up. If you maintain your efforts, however, you will likely reap what you sow.
iStock/Thinkstock
This just in from the love lab: Surprisingly quirky—and scientifically proven—ways to maintain a great relationship.
Pretend you just met.
Whether you've been together for six months or six years, spend some time each day acting as if you just started dating. Ask him what he thought of that TV episode or share what you'd do if you won the lottery. "Over time, couples stop asking those exploratory, get-to-know-you questions because they think they already understand each other," says Terri Orbuch, Ph.D., author of 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage from Good to Great. But because we all continue to change and develop, little daily check-ins like this are what keep the connection growing, according to Orbuch's research of 373 pairs. Chat about something besides the daily grind—at least for a bit.
Nurture your friends' relationships.
You might divorce-proof your own. According to researchers, the breakup of a close pal's marriage increases your odds of splitting by as much as 75 percent. "Some people may see another's divorce as permission to change their own life," says study coauthor Rose McDermott, Ph.D. But when you encourage friends to stay together (happily), you may generate reasons that also apply to your bond.
Burn bras (together).
Forget flowers—feminism is the new romance, say experts at Rutgers University in New Jersey. Women whose male partner is a feminist report better relationship quality, while men with feminist partners experience more sexual satisfaction and relationship stability. "A male feminist partner may increase a woman's ability to realize her own goals and career ambitions," says study author Laurie Rudman, Ph.D. "And male feminists are probably not threatened by their partner's strivings." Plus, these women may be more likely to initiate sex, and no guy will complain about that.
Don't win an Oscar.
That is unless you'd like to thank the academy for ruining your relationship. A Best Actress winner is 63 percent more likely to have her marriage end before her category mates do, say researchers at Carnegie Mellon University and the University of Toronto. (And it's not an honor just to be nominated either: Sixty percent of all nominees, male or female, experience at least one divorce after getting a nod.) While the breakup rate might seem like celebrity hogwash, the findings may speak to an underlying social norm: Sudden one-sided success can put a strain on a romantic partnership. "The increased rate of divorce may be due to a husband's discomfort with his wife's success," says study author Colleen Stuart, Ph.D. "On the other hand, the wife may grow dissatisfied with her current marital arrangement because she now has the confidence and opportunity to move away from a bad relationship." Try to remain a power couple: Encourage and celebrate each other's successes, big and small.
Tweet responsibly.
According to a survey of 100,000 people from OkCupid.com, avid tweeters tend to have shorter relationships—10 percent shorter, on average—than those who don't microblog. "Having your eyes glued to a smartphone screen isn't exactly conducive to romance," says Hatt. Be sure your tendency toward technology (tweets, texts, and otherwise) doesn't take up time better spent engaging in heart-to-heart communication with your guy.
Hold a grudge (as long as he doesn't).
Provided that your partner is able to bounce back from spats, you'll experience greater satisfaction, even if you tend to stay P.O.'d, according to recent research. The mark of a good recovery: You don't allow conflicts about one issue—say, money—to spill over into other areas of your relationship, such as how you help each other after a tough day, says study author Jessica E. Salvatore, Ph.D., of the University of Minnesota. A yang to your yin yields harmony.
Control the boozing.
Any relationship will be shaken and stirred by too much alcohol, but research suggests that young adults who drink heavily (meaning four or more drinks on one occasion for women; five or more for guys) are less likely to wed in the first place and may be at greater risk for early separation if they do. Partyers may be more likely to have commitment issues to begin with, and once they couple up their bonds may be unstable. "If you're going to be in a solid intimate partnership, you're going to need all the good judgment and compassion you can muster," says Hatt. Which means keeping the drinking in check.
Be the beauty to his beast.
Coupling up with an average Joe (with a beer belly) may be the key to long-term love. According to a study in the Journal of Family Psychology, when men were married to more attractive women, they seemed more likely to step up to the plate, says study author Benjamin R. Karney, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at the University of California at Los Angeles. "But when husbands were better-looking, they didn't seem as engaged in helping their wives achieve their goals." (Size matters too: When women had a lower BMI than their guy, both partners tended to be more satisfied, according to other research.) The real secret to success? Support. Whether you're motivated by a gorgeous face or some other quality, couples are more likely to enjoy long-run happiness when they're invested in each other's welfare.
Limit the chick flicks.
If Jennifer Aniston and Ashton Kutcher regularly appear in your living room, your union could be in the danger zone. "Romantic comedies can set up unreasonable expectations, which may lead to unnecessary suffering," says Sean Patrick Hatt, Ph.D., a psychologist in Seattle. "Comparing yourselves with idealized others is a recipe for misery." Sure, rom-coms can be feel-good escapes, but they may also promote magical thinking about relationships. For example, as partnerships mature and the initial intensity tends to fade, many couples try to recapture the euphoria they had in the beginning, says Hatt. "And that sort of thinking is only reinforced by Hollywood endings," he adds. Stocking your Netflix queue? Treat the rom-coms as, well, treats.
Twist the sheets at least once a week.
The average American gets busy about two or three times a month, but increasing your romps to once a week generates as much bliss as scoring an extra $50,000 in income, according to researchers from Dartmouth College and the University of Warwick in England. It's not so much the sex itself that leads to happiness; the frequency is a better marker for a successful relationship. "Couples who like each other end up in bed more often," says study author Andrew J. Oswald, Ph.D. "And it's the liking-each-other part that increases joy." But seriously, who needs a reason? Bank on more booty.
Issue date: July/August 2011

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The secrets of a happy relationship and a dream marriage

What makes for a happy relationship? What are the secrets?
How can you create a dream marriage? How can you be happy?
How does a relationship make people happy, so that they're more resilient when dealing with the inevitable difficult times?
I really want you to believe that you have every chance of happiness! That’s what I work towards in all of my sessions as a couple counsellor. I know it can be really tough and SO stressful when you have relationship problems.
So, this article is packed full of tips and 'secrets' to help you have the best possible chance of creating a happy marriage or fantastic long-term relationship.

The recipe for a happy marriage or relationship, and how to be happy.

Of course it’s vital that you start with some common ground. Shared values and beliefs without a doubt strengthen a relationship.
Beyond that, I’m assuming that you’ve already filtered out unsuitable partners (if not, have a look at my Relationship or Marriage Compatibility Test). So now you’ve established – or you’re in the process of establishing - a great long-term relationship, with or without a view to getting married.
Join me now to discover the key secrets of a happy relationship…

Attention - fulfilling an essential emotional need

The way couples give and receive attention is THE most important factor in an intimate relationship.  As human beings our need for attention overrides any other need.  So, simply by giving your partner attention you’ll do your relationship or marriage the world of good.
There is one caveat though.  The secret is that it has to be the kind of attention that your partner values.  So for example, showering your partner with kisses at every opportunity may feel great to you.  BUT that might make your partner feel overwhelmed. So don't be surprised if this hampers intimacy rather than creates it. The secrets of a happy relationship lie in you paying attention to what your partner would really like.
Here are some tips on how to give your partner some loving attention:
  • send a card every now and then, when it’s not expected - it takes so little effort and can have such a positive impact
  • send romantic texts
  • leave 'love notes' or cards in briefcases, lunch boxes, pockets etc.
  • tell your partner what exactly you love about him or her and ...
  • why that’s important to you, rather than just saying you love them
  • flirt with your partner in the way that you know he or she appreciates (not in the way it suits you) – regardless of how long you've been together
  • continue to invest time in novel activities, outings and experiences (this stimulates the dopamine circuit, which helps to create that wonderfully exciting romantic feeling)
  • contribute to telling the story of your relationship in a special journal - create a record of all the positive experiences you have together
All of the following tips in this article on the secrets of a happy relationship or dream marriage are examples of how to give your partner loving attention too.
Oh... and by the way, don’t forget - giving each other attention implies giving generously of your time.
2 Birds next to each other. How to give joyfully and what love really means
3

Helpful non-verbal communication

The purpose of communicating isn't only to pass on information. You also communicate to create a sense of intimacy both emotionally and sexually.
Communication can be divided into verbal communication and non-verbal communication - wow... nothing new here then!
The two of course often overlap, but let's break them down even further.  Verbal communication consists not only of talking and listening, but also of reading and writing.
Verbal communication can happen face-to-face, via emails or texts, or any hand-written messages.
Do you now see how many opportunities you have to create that intimacy and those special feelings?  Use all of them to create your recipe for a happy marriage or relationship.
Here are some other ingredients in my recipe for a healthy, happy relationship and a dream marriage:
  • Look into each other's eyes - you'll see couples do it when they first fall in love. Gazing into your partner's eyes really 'affirms' him or her
  • Hold, stroke and massage hands (and feet - when appropriate!)
  • Touch in many unexpected ways - without making it sexual… as well as making sure you’re in a suitable environment! Touching stimulates the release of oxytocin, the bonding hormone, which creates a sense of trust and security
For touching to really work its magic – with or without sexual connotation - you each need to have the intent to please your partner. That really is one of the secrets of a happy relationship or marriage.  It needs sensitivity and possibly a willingness to move out of your comfort zone - even if slowly... Try not to be selfish by wanting to have it your way all the time.
It’s also very important that you’re sensitive to your partner’s needs. You or your partner may have grown up in a family where people were just not used to being tactile, so do be aware of how it makes you both feel.
Have you or your partner been subjected to inappropriate touching in the past?  If so, any touching - hugging, cuddling, kissing, holding hands and so on - may sadly come with a great deal of anxiety.  I really know about this problem from all those clients (including couples) who have sought my help. I just want you to know that you can overcome this problem.  Do consider talking therapy - (relationship) counselling can make a real difference.

Helpful verbal communication

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain."

- Anonymous
There are hundreds of pages on this website with relationship advice, including a page where you can chat with on online counsellor.  They all contribute to your knowledge, awareness and understanding of (relationship) problems and situations.  All of that can improve your empathy and compassion, which in turn improves how you communicate with each other.
Do have a look at the links at the end of the series in Part 3 for more information about verbal and non-verbal communication.
And I've got plenty more tips for you now! So hop over to Part 2 for more Happy Relationship Secrets, and my advice on dealing with the challenges and tough times.
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
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CHINEKWU ANTHONY UGBOR



 CHINEKWU ANTHONY UGBOR
Chinekwu Anthony Ugbor was born November 27th 1984 in Igbo Etiti local government area of Enugu, Nigeria. He was raised in a small University campus in Bayero University Kano. He attended Charity Nursery School, Aku, Enugu state, Federal College of Education Staff Primary School Kano, Bayero University Staff Secondary School Kano and Federal College of Education Staff Secondary School Kano all in Kano State Nigeria. He earned a degree in Library and Information Sciences/Sociology, Msc in Library and Information Sciences with specialization in Information Science all at Bayero University Kano.  I am also known Chineks the  Igbo seed of the Internet and Black scientist